


Tie-Dyed

by PrivateFluff (orphan_account)



Category: Apex Legends (Video Games)
Genre: Comedy, Crack, F/F, Fluff, Kissing, Public Nudity, Trans Female Character, Useless Lesbians, like srsly this is the only reason I can think of why renee can't wear tie-dyes, poor natalie just wanted to help, sitcom misunderstandings, the other legends without tie-dye skins have similarly traumatic experiences, watch respawn ad a tie-dye skin for every hero a week after this is posted
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-26
Updated: 2019-10-26
Packaged: 2021-01-03 15:43:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,097
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21181922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/PrivateFluff
Summary: A theory as to why Wraith can't wear a tie-dye skin like her girlfriend.





	Tie-Dyed

Wraith knocked three times on the door to her old room. It opened and Pathfinder greeted her.

“Hello Wraith. You are naked.”

“Nice observation Path. Let me in.”

“Okay. Anything for a friend.”

The robot stepped aside and Wraith stepped in, closing the door behind her. The room hadn’t really changed much since she moved out. If anything, it was more decorated now that it belonged to Pathfinder.

“Is something the matter, Wraith?”

“Well Path, as you said. I am naked.”

“Oh. Of course. It is not ordinary for humans to walk around naked.”

Wraith’s sighed and folded her arms over her chest. “Look, my clothes went missing from laundry and you’re the only one that I trust to be cool about this.”

“Is it because I am not fully capable of understanding human social norms?”

“Something like that. Do you still have that sweater that Makoa gave you over the break last year?”

“Oh yes. I keep it in a very special place.” Pathfinder walked over to a nondescript crate and reached into it, pulling out a massive tie-dyed sweater.

“That your special place?”

“It is the easiest crate in this room to access. I keep all of my most valued possessions in it, so I don’t have any trouble getting to them.”

“Right. Can I borrow that sweater? I just need to get back to Nat’s room and change into some clothes of my own.”

“Of course friend. Happy to help!”

Pathfinder enthusiastically handed her the sweater and Wraith grimaced. It was made for someone twice her height and five times as broad, it was gonna be like wearing a tent.

“Oh well. Here goes nothing.” Wraith disappeared into the sweater, and her head emerged from a hole that could have handily fit her entire tiny frame through it. She bunched the sleeves up under her arms and looked down. It reached three quarters of the way to the floor. “I’ll have it back to you in no time path.”

“I cannot wait. But actually, I can. I just said that to express excitement.”

Wraith exited the robot’s room and started to pad her way back across the length of its hull to her room - what kind of monster designs a ship where the laundry is 200 meters from the bedroom anyway?

Only a few more hallways anyway. She hadn’t run into anyone yet, she could probably make it.

“Blasey, wait up a sec.”

Wraith considered opening a portal and running, but thought better of it. She’d discovered from experience that it wasn’t a great idea to mess around with her powers on the ship.

Luckily for her she’d been wearing jump jets at the time.

“Anita. What. A. Surprise.”

“Gotta pay more attention then.” Bangalore caught up to her and clapped her on the shoulder. “Listen, I was headin’ down to the range. Figured it might be - what are you wearing?”

Bangalore looked her up and down and Wraith clenched her fists.

“A tie-dyed sweater.”

“So I see. It uh, looks a little big for you.”

“I’m borrowing it from Pathfinder.”

“You wearing anything underneath?”

Wraith gritted her teeth and her cheeks flamed as she heard Mirage walk up behind her.

“You’re not that great with the ladies, are you Witt.”

“Whaaaat? Come on, I am phenomenal with the ladies. I even dated your lady friend.”

Bangalore looked unimpressed. “Step down jackass, you don’t wanna start this fight.”

“Okay, message received. Not what I really wanted to know anyway, the real question is: Renee.” Mirage gestured up and down at Wraith. “Why are you dressed like that?”

Wraith glared at him. “None of your business,  _ Elliot _ .” She said his name with as much of an implicit threat as she could muster.

“Woo, okay. Everyone is in a bad mood with Mirage today.”

“Maybe if you didn’t actively piss them off, they wouldn’t be.”

Wraith felt a little piece of herself die when she heard Crypto’s voice. This was going from embarrassing to humiliating.

“Oh, babe, thank god you’re here. I think these ladies might wanna kill me.”

“And you’d want  _ me _ to save you?” Crypto idly flipped his surveillance drone over his shoulder and stowed it.

“I’m not even sure I’d save ya from that.”

Wraith, who had been edging her way around Crypto to make her escape, cursed as her path was obstructed by a sudden Lifeline.

“Renee, what is that you are wearin?”

Wraith had never hated anything more than that stupid sweater at that moment.

“It’s. A tie-dyed sweater.”

“I never took you for the tie-die type.”

“I am not. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’d like to get back to my room.”

“Don’t let me keep ya sister.” Lifeline stood aside and Wraith marched past her, leaving the crowd in the hallway behind her.

“Hey, what’s everyone doing?” Octane showed up late to the party, and looked down the hallway after Wraith. “Oh em gee, what is Renee wearing? Is everyone else seeing this?!”

Wraith rounded the corner and sped up til she reached the room that she shared with her girlfriend.

The door slid open and the glowering woman stepped inside, and as the door slid shut behind her she was immediately assailed by Wattson, who kissed her excitably and then stepped back, bouncing on the soles of her feet. Wraith was already feeling better.

“My love, I am happy to see you! I just got done fixing a surprise.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Oui! Go and sit on the bed.”

Wraith obliged her girlfriend, already having forgotten what she was wearing.

“Close your eyes.”

Wraith obeyed, the embarrassment of the crowd in the hallway already a distant memory.

“Just a moment. Okay, open them!”

Wraith opened them. Standing before her was her girlfriend, holding up her own outfit in one hand, and Wraith’s in the other. But there was something different about-

“I tie-dyed them so we would match when we fight together!”

Wraith’s internal monologue was one long drawn-out scream. But her girlfriend seemed so happy, so Wraith smiled through it.

“W-wow, Nat. It’s… wonderful.”

Wattson squealed excitedly and hugged her, while Wraith’s mind went to formulating a plan. She would commission an entirely new outfit, then convince Caustic to dissolve this one with one of his chemicals. She couldn’t exactly do anything about her girlfriend’s outfit, but one thing was for sure, Wraith never wanted to wear tie-dyed clothes again.

“Wait a second, what is this you are wearing cherie?”

Wraith flushed and balled her fists in the hideous fabric. “Y-you see, that’s kind of a long story.”


End file.
